Te nonāk viss, kam vairs nav vietas Helsas galvā

Do you scream?

Okey.. so maybe I really should turn back to Punk Rock, even though I know it’ll turn me into the person I was.. the person who hated everyone and everything, who didn’t want to talk to anyone, was quiet and shy, wore only black, didn’t sleep, had more bruises than reasons to explain them.. didn’t eat, didn’t smile.. I was rather depressed back then.. but it helped me to concentrate on more important things. Right now I’m .. well I’d love to say happy, but actually I’m  just numb and dull. While I really want to keep my mind sharp, to be hungry for everything that’s happening. To feel the world around me. Like I used to when I was a kid.. even when the surroundings turned me down to tears.. I was alive. Right now I’m in some sort of a deep sleep and it’s really hard to open your eyes when you’re coming from dark back to the sunshine.  It hurts, but it needs to be done for the sake of others and myself. Trying to be happy didn’t work out well for me.. I guess. The only good thing I can promise to you.. I won’t leave my friends this time. I’ve done that for too many times. Still.. you’ll have to be more active to keep in touch with me.. ’cause I don’t think I’ll be even able to speak up to anyone. Suit yourself.. I’ll see who really does care about me when I’m not the one who entertains.
So yeah.. it’s time to get reasonable, responsible and punk.

‘Cause for me punk means caring.
Anarchy means changing the system..
Living means being on the edge and screaming for more space



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